Ugly Little Dreams

Frances keep your mouth shut dear
We don't want the neighbors 'round
With their ugly little schemes
That make the pretty world go 'round
And there's a place in it for every one of us
I'll keep the home fires burning
Only don't make a fuss

And if you're not impressed
With the wares life has to show
You can take them or leave them
They choose their own fare who say no
There's some ugly little dreams
For pretty girls to buy
It's enough to make you mad
But it's safer just to break down and cry
It's a battlefield Frances
You fight or concede
Victory to the enemy
Who call your strength insanity

What cahnce for such girls
How can we compete?
In a world that likes its women
Stupid and sweet

I bet you rue the day
The angels gave you your share
Of bright cornflower blue eyes
And golden hair
And there's a lot of ugly little dreams
For pretty girls to buy
It's enough to make you mad
But it's safer just to break down and cry
It's safer just to break down and cry

-Everything but the Girl

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EBTG has been a band I've kept up with over the years. What created the interest was their dynamic sound, investment in many instruments, and the leads powerful vocals. What kept the interest was what the lyrics touched on - ethics and rights within relationships, political commentary, and largely on the human experience.

Looking information up on EBTG, I ran into their focuses on their debut album which was pretty much what I described above.

Ugly little dreams is about those who were shocked and upset by women with too many ideas.

It's about Frances Farmer in particular. That struck interest -- who is she I asked and wikied it. What I found proved interesting... Frances in her youth won a writing contest in 1931, for her religiously controversial essay. Later when she was attending university won over another writing contest for a leftist newpaper. (which was probably moderate compared to these days) this won her a trip to go visit the Soviet Union which her family fiercely objected to.

Frances began an acting career in the big screen pictures. She was very unhappy with her career as she was only given 'pretty girl' and damsel like roles, instead of ones where she could find a creative niche with her talents. It was a time when movie studios were very controlling of their actors and actresses lives. As a result she clashed a lot with the buecracy within Paramount Studios refusing to mold.

I can't continue to depict her as a struggling artist and put her up as a complete martyr of her times. The trouble she got in later was of her own accord, as she developed heavy drinking problems. Her little incident with the police was interesting though during war time when all lights were ordered for a black out period. She went rebeliously driving down the road with her brights on. Then there is breaking her make up artists jaw (I would have loved to have been present) . Yet her contrary views led "proffessionals" to diagnose her with bipolar disorder, for her seeking things outside of accepted culture.


I do like her story though and it winds down to a comment by Ray Bradbury. "a man runs when he sees anything of a mind in a woman." (rough quote, I have handicapped quoting skills as I am sure one of you can verify in other situations) Thankfully this quote doesn't ring so true anymore, almost minus certain communities where women are ordained to be baby cranking factories. Yet it did bring a smile to my face, it does sometimes touch home minus the gender references and added in particular family references.


"I bet you rue the day
The angels gave you your share
Of bright cornflower blue eyes
And golden hair"

is a very interesting couple of lines from the song, I think. It has something to say on what is expected of women when it comes to men and the crowds for that matter.

I've had many a friend who felt overwhelmed by trying to gain attentions of the opposite gender. Many friends who felt that her worth was contingent on her ability to be attractive, and to be worthwhile. To be charming and sucumbing to prevalent demands for a girl to be entertaining. Well dammit those things aren't just about being pleased or entertaining. I've seen too many girls who don't find enough esteem in themselves and become dependent on whatever kind of security a relation with a guy can give her. Though it's not just ungrounded and self insecured girls that cling to this.

However I feel the opposite is true. I feel there is an underculture of women who are obsessed with glamour, power and manipulation over partners. Yet they still cling to the demand to be a particular genre of charming and entertaining outside of standard (by standard I mean common things like courting flirting and means to relations and such, what I mean is the whole charming thing is getting overblown.)

Bottom line: we shouldn't be expected to be any more diplomatically and dynamically charming than what is natural, than what men are (not to say that men and the stake of natural are directly synonymous or opposing). It's not duty to be pretty attractive alpha vixens contrary to what pop culture is trying to tell us all. I'd love to see pop culture grow in insight for once...

And I could go on about how the teen to adult road is practically non existent and how we still have 37 year old men and women who are paranoid about their upkeep on trendiness, acting and wishing they could be as hip as they were when they were 18. Hey what about other things of worth? We just generating lifelong super hormone charged teenagers nowadays?

How cute. . .

Even in these modern times excessive prerequisites for a woman to even be considered as attractive are too heavy. Sorry we're not all about acting pretty, and believe me what a sad act it is. Sorry to say there is something more between the lines there. I realized a sad truth when joking around with my younger brother. "Derek, this is sooo sad, you could have a guy be really ugly, obese, or freakishly skinny, who is the funniest and fun person ever and he could get a lot of dates. But if you turn it around and it's a heavy girl, or a not so cute faced kind of girl and she's left with slim pickins. if not dying alone" "yup" and we both laughed.

Yet why is this true?

Watching a television makeover show I was taken aback by a couple. There was a well built man with what most women would claim as being handsome faced and a mousy faced bushy haired girl who wasn't very easy on the eyes as some would say. It was very odd to see this couple hand in hand. I was a little confused by the fact that I was confused. Yet it's not nearly that startling when you see a girl go with a guy that is far far from being the next runner up for male model of the year. I couldn't explain the confusion at first, but then I realized more and more that its a sick and unfair part of our culture.

I walked past as my dad was watching Miss Congeniality on t.v. (great movie !) one of the pagent officials stammered on to say "I've been fighting my whole career against people like you, feminists, intellectuals:: Ugly women!" Yes I appreciate the humor but this brings up the point again. They focus less on being pleasing creatures to men. In this case I am referencing ugly as being unattractive in manner or in appearance. This kind of ugly she probably means as women who don't choose to apply cosmetics as a daily routine. I see no immediate problem with makeup as I wear it and wear it for myself only but I really do give a salute to women who don't feel it's a necessity or a requirement. :)


Kudos to Ms. Farmer, especially in a time when it was much much worse and unequal.

Kudos to EBTG composed of two members - one female and one male who support this belief.