a right as you also have...

We were sitting in the front room, I lounged in my p.j.s . Dad usually doesn't talk much politics but there we were on the topic. President Bush. The war in Iraq. Protesters. Vietnam.

He lowered his head, whispered, don't tell your mom this but. I mean I hate Mayor Rocky Anderson, want to drag him from the back of a truck for a few blocks but... i was listening to him at work, and I *really* think he has a right to an opinion. I think so.

Don't tell your mom.

It is not our purpose to become each other; it is to recognize each other, to learn
to see the other and honor him for what he is.

Hermann Hesse

couldn't call them on it

The topic of the Keirsey sorter arose in a number of my classes in high school and once last semester. Any personality test I question the sensitivity of the results. I have a deep skepticism of any people sorting methods, took it again at the same site* Yet I came up the same. I thought it wouldn't seeing as it 'claims' that only 25% of the population have this temperment yet another source claims that it is little as 8%-10%, but no matter. I see these kinds of things being overly sensitive in their questionares usually, like the color personality tests. Still interesting though, little rebuttle from me this time.

_______________________________________________________________________________
YOU ARE AN IDEALIST

Idealists, as a temperament, are passionately concerned with personal growth and development. Idealists strive to discover who they are and how they can become their best possible self -- always this quest for self-knowledge and self-improvement drives their imagination. And they want to help others make the journey. Idealists are naturally drawn to working with people, and whether in education or counseling, in social services or personnel work, in journalism or the ministry, they are gifted at helping others find their way in life, often inspiring them to grow as individuals and to fulfill their potentials.

Idealists are sure that friendly cooperation is the best way for people to achieve their goals. Conflict and confrontation upset them because they seem to put up angry barriers between people. Idealists dream of creating harmonious, even caring personal relations, and they have a unique talent for helping people get along with each other and work together for the good of all. Such interpersonal harmony might be a romantic ideal, but then Idealists are incurable romantics who prefer to focus on what might be, rather than what is. The real, practical world is only a starting place for Idealists; they believe that life is filled with possibilities waiting to be realized, rich with meanings calling out to be understood. This idea of a mystical or spiritual dimension to life, the "not visible" or the "not yet" that can only be known through intuition or by a leap of faith, is far more important to Idealists than the world of material things.

Highly ethical in their actions, Idealists hold themselves to a strict standard of personal integrity. They must be true to themselves and to others, and they can be quite hard on themselves when they are dishonest, or when they are false or insincere. More often, however, Idealists are the very soul of kindness. Particularly in their personal relationships, Idealists are without question filled with love and good will. They believe in giving of themselves to help others; they cherish a few warm, sensitive friendships; they strive for a special rapport with their children; and in marriage they wish to find a "soulmate," someone with whom they can bond emotionally and spiritually, sharing their deepest feelings and their complex inner worlds.

Idealists are rare, making up between 20 and 25 percent of the population. But their ability to inspire people with their enthusiasm and their idealism has given them influence far beyond their numbers.




________
http://www.advisorteam.com/temperament_sorter/register.asp

*(a 'professional' personality website which charges for its indepth reports which only hosted a copy of the Keirsey test. c'mon people charging is for the birds... erm well in Hitchcockian times that is...)

too easy

"People naturally fear misfortune and long for good fortune; but if the distinction is carefully studied, misfortune often turns out to be good fortune and good fortune to be misfortune."

this is a clip from the Dharma of Buddha. How interesting. Can this say that fortune takes more responsibility and control than misfortune?

how easy it is for me to embark upon worry. whatever comes will come with my welcome. Total gain or loss in anyday, the joy and wonder still remain however hidden it may be. i accept that events may end in my favor or end against it. so I live it, know what is before me as best I can, it is fleeting without any promises to stay. Less worry, fear. It's about losing the contingence on third party promises. Life should not be feared, misfortunes and fortunes attached. I will enjoy my day.

I need no promises, other than the morning sun.

Legend of Zelda - Twilight princess was postponed again but only by two months... Not bad, nearly promising but I'm not keeping my fingers crossed.

November 2006. Plenty of time for me to acquire the means necessary. THOUGH I THOUGHT I WOULD BE PURCHASING IT AT GRAYWHALE. They release their games a day late and discount them a tad to compensate.

OOiuo, this is going to be one of those weeks...

Ugnh... Brains. And I thought I could sword fight.

ugh

The putrid odor of matrix perm treatment is taking my house by storm. The horrors of being down wind, this room of mine seems to always get the worst of it by virtue of the vents and location. Not to mention hair color, but that one was one me. But jeez two perms in a row? Hey ladies how bout I go and curl your hair for the rest of the week so my house can smell half decent. That way I don't have to wheexze and hallicinate with the combined fumes of matrix hair color, primer and latex paint, and perm curl settler and inducer? huh? huh? Never mind, it's truly a game of pick your poison, having to fluff up old women's afros or endure chemical warfare.

and it gets all the better when your mother decides to bring the source into your room to show miss perm rod scalp the new paint job. The smells I swear are alive... *gag*

as little left to say

I could go on and list all sorts of 'trivial' things about my evening.

Like how the week I began orange tags were half off and the week I left orange tags were again discounted. One of the regulars met me over at the jewelry case, stocky and tall, backpacked as usual finding curiousity at trinkets I would pass by. She always seems to pick out things with rustic elegance, much like herself.

There was this man who resales handbags on ebay, eccentric looking with a roman face. Huge rectangular glasses, thick hair like the scientist on back to the future. He came to the register back when I was all tied up and bound by the ropes I was trying to learn. I completely messed up on the transaction before him, and then blundered on his check out as well. "Don't worry its a part of life. We mess up and then go from there." was his rough wording. I expected him to be angry or impatient, but not in the least. I would have told him thank you but... I just shyed off.

Kara stopped me in the parking lot and asked me to call now and then, tell her how things are. I act stiff around her still. I don't think I have ever met a woman with such an contrasting presence, hard and scanning at the same time as caring and maternal.

"if you bore me I am comfortable, if you interest me I am scared." It's a quote I find so relevant to my personality.

As I was chucking things into the compactor I nticed Margaret lighting up a smoke. She'd just quit recently. She sat there on the dock with a willowly look to her, dangling her old and tired feet over the end.

I hated the politics of the place. No doubt about it. Obviously admist my complaints something kept me there longer than usual. I don't think I was meant to leave earlier than now.

I kind of choked up when I saw the gift basket they had arranged for me at the end of the shift. Chocolate, a candle, flowers, and a silly cat figurine, a card written in Margaret's beautiful cursive.

I thought about when Marché left. You should have seen her whir through those dressing rooms, completely up to par. There was something so hardworking and efficient about her. Marché would sit alone on breaks, with her igloo lunch box plastered with cat and starwars stickers. We left with about the same reputations.

My mom pointed out the other day that I get along best with the older employees. I shrugged.

I need to call them tommorrow. My card fell out in the store. I could go on about the little things.

too much fun

I really shouldn't be paid for these kinds of cheap thrills.

Dude. Tell me it isn't fun breaking oversized random objects into pieces!!!!!

Liz tried again and again to get the'bloody couch down into that frigging compactah'. I proceeded to jump into that compactor pit and slam the wretched blue couch towards the mechanism. I managed to beat the back off of the couch, and collaspe the arm. hee hee. I kicked a huge hole into the base too. The sides were reinforced with some sort of steel and wouldn't budge.

There was also some problem with some boards that were stuck above the compressor. Blah. So I handed Liz a metal bat who was jumping and stomping almost as maniacly as I had earlier on these boards. She took a few stabs and swings, let Erin take over. Erin's dread locks were flipping all over the place as she took a weight lifting bar and speared holes into the board and mumbled that this location should have an axe handy.

Erin takes the hippie award of the year, no contest. And seeing her take prey on this plank of wood made the day almost priceless. Holy shiot.


I'm trying to get the gumption to ask Haily my vegitarian coworker to hang out sometime. Try out some movie buisness as dangerous as that is. lol. There is something so otherly yet cultured about her demeanor that its hard to describe. *shrugs* I'll see how that goes.

I wonder where next week will take me.

i shouldn't think at night

The most intense rounds in life are fought with subtleties. A brief flair of words, a passing gesture, it's meant to be delivered with the same feverish trickle of a papercut.

Summarizing always angered me ever since I was young. With the boundaries of a summary I could never express my wonder or exasperation, the winding details that set an event apart from any other occurrence.

Then again, think about it. One word could be a thousand pictures, a picture a thousand words.

Something in me enjoys harping out the starkest attributes from my understanding. There is something to it, tacking something down as best as someone can through the medium of expression.

O'Keefe found the beauty of simplistic curves and gradualising color, pinning art down to its most basic elements. Whether it was painting a swirl of sky or oddly arranged skeletal remains amongst the spring blooms or a leave protruding from a stem. She drew interest to it. Though this is not limited to art.

The power isn't so much in the brevity as it is in the up close perspective.

Even the order of which you reveal the content of a message can completely rearrange the impression.

Interesting.

holy cow

Maybe I can muster up the sanity to finish my two weeks notice.

Emphasis on maybe.

Goodness I don't want to go today. I'm in no mood to be hounded after every minute I am on the clock by supervisors who are desperate to keep their jobs with an anal rententive manager. I just hope my coworkers can get out of there before it gets insane. There ain't no way they'd get me to sign agreements unauthorized by the company.

Until then there are a few distractions i still have. Like the supreme coolness of finding an awesome band you forgot about smack you across the face from some movie's credits. So 'Low' was responsible for the song Half Light... Muah ha ha.

Can I play my nintendo console on this mac?

I NEED my super nintendo! I need a nap, hot chocolate. Bloody frickin frackkin frunum. How am I going to make it through another ...

contagion or happenstance?

Rewatching "The Mothman Prophecies" has curiousified me again about theories of mass hysteria. the subject itself is interesting, sound or unsound, either way it will turn up as thought provoking. Either it's (but not limited to) a palpable pattern of social responses to archetyped conditions; a social state that can be logically explained or there is an additional element coming into play; that being the paranormal , influence of a divinity or elevated being or condition, or extraterristial happenings.

One time when I was at work I was asked to mop up an 'accident' in the rest I was the only one staffed who could stomach it. I admit I almost threw up myself looking upon and being so near the mess. Ick.

But there it is - a common reaction between people.
It is very common to become queasy and sick stomached at the sight and smell of puke or human waste. Many will have biological impulses to regurgitate themselves after nearing such. It creates a domino effect of biological manifestations of disgust.

Think back to a meeting within an organization in which you attend i.e. church or school. Someone among the seated crowd will probably yawn, and before you know it. Its like chicken pox. One initial yawner, three responding yawners etc. More dominoes.

::Yes... It is late. I'm even yawning. ::

Can this be applicable to independant matter that is well exposed to a public, which becomes archetyped after being well rooted in a publics affairs? Is it limited to biology? We are a intensly social species.


A few instances which some attribute group hysteria or shared delusions that immediately come to mind is the Salem Witchcraft Trials and the Red Scare that had the U.S. jerking like a nervous bird.

Paranoia is contagious. Have you ever been in an open area with friends at night when the surroundings have been a bit spooky, and the rest of them became spooked. Even if you don't get spooked yourself by such things, you still feel their growing fear. That fear will probably more than likely make you uneasy. I'm not salying you will be cowardized right there, but fear is something that is very easily signalled from one human to the next. How you respond is one thing, you don't have to squirm liek the rest are doing, but I am sure that that would be one of your more basest responses.

I've really got to look into this when I am more coherent and energized. Daaamn. I am soo sleepy. Perhaps I can salvage some vital brain cells while I sleep.

That went well

Strange.

"So we don't think we are going to stay till the end of the lease. We're staying with his mom in New Mexico."

"Yeah? Me too. I'm going in with my parents again"

"Yeah?"

"Yep."

"BUT THE FISHIES!?!"

lol

Quinn: "If Dad had died, I would've been freaked out for, like, years."
Jake: "That's the spirit, sweetie. Avenge my death."
Daria: "You're not dying, Dad."
Jake: "Avenge me!"

boxing

I get the feeling it will be one of those days.

Or these days... I do what I must.

I would have gotten boxes from work, but Savers flooded over. The drain in the emergency door let up, a small leak and as soon as they opened it, it was up to their shins. However that works. I did see the inside and the closed signs, water was everywhere.

I've already begun packing. My mom says she'll be scouting out for boxes. I'm thinking about renting a uhaul. Dad will be entirely less irritable. I'd honestly do all the moving if I could. I can, but not without throwing my back out again.

Tammie can't pay the bills this month, again. I'll do what I can to help her finish this month. Losing a little plasma never hurt. We can switch the names in the lease.

Fun things to work out now.

I feel strange wherever I go.

Leaving and coming 'home' is equally strange.